Once upon a time there was a Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess who lived in the faraway land of Durham, North Carolina.

She was a merry, precocious Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess who loved to fill her days with beautiful gowns, silly dance parties, wild outdoor activities, and tall tales full of mystery and adventure.

Oh, and chocolate.  Loads and loads of chocolate.

This was a very important day for the Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess because it was her birthday — her 5th BIRTHDAY to be precise.

On this very important birthday the Magnificent-Enchanting-Svelte-Fairy-Queen-Mother sat with the Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess, and asked her what she would wish for.

The Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess put on her best thinking glasses and thought and thought and thought.  For she knew that on this very important birthday she must make a very important wish.

As she thought, the Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess was struck with the realization that while she liked being a princess, who ruled her little kingdom well with a bit of humor, a bit of force, and a whole lotta panache…

…she did NOT like sharing her throne with her two Little Brothers.

I mean, my goodness!  They were loud and rowdy and sometimes very smelly, and they were always in the middle of everything!

A Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess could barely get a moment to herself with brothers like that!

“What I’d really like,” thought the Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess, “would be to SWAP my stinky little brothers for some magical powers!”

Following in the footsteps of her majestic princess heroes, Elsa and Rapunzel, the Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess dreamt of securing her dominion over her little land by shooting ice from her hands and having long, flowing golden hair that glowed when she sang.

“Yes,” she thought to herself.  “That’d do it.”

And so on July 9th, her 5th birthday, she closed her eyes, took a deep breath, and wished for it to be so.

She wished and wished and prayed and wished.

But when she opened her eyes, it wasn’t.

“Shucks.”

Her little brothers were still there, her hands were still just ordinary hands (with no ice or magical snowflakes to be seen), and her hair was most definitely still just short, blondish-brownish hair that was not in the least bit flowy or shimmery.

Same ole, same ole.

But then in the midst of her disappointment the Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess ruminated, “Well, I guess life with two little brothers isn’t always that bad.  Without them I wouldn’t have anyone to make forts with…or dress up with…or make funny faces with…or wake up waaaaaaaay too early to share morning cuddles with.”

“And if my brothers weren’t my brothers, WHO would partner with me in the next season of
Dancing with the Stars: Home Edition?!?!?”

(type in “wright” to watch)

Nope, being without them just wouldn’t do.

And so the Little Miss Fairy-Kitten-Princess, on her very special 5th birthday, decided that life with little brothers was pretty fun after all.  And that maybe, just maybe, wishing instead to have them around as her own personal henchmen was better than ruling her kingdom alone, armed with just icy hands and golden hair.

But a girl can always DREAM!

Happy 5th birthday, sweet Annabelle Jane!  LONG MAY YOU RULE!!!

5 year old stats:
– Height: 3’10” (97%)
– Weight: 44lb 3.2oz (77%)

At the Littles’ preschool the parents serve as classroom TAs on a rotating basis.  This co-op system has been great because it has helped me get to know the teachers and kids, and ensured that my pantry is always well stocked with advil and wine (two must-haves in any semi-functioning Mommy establishment, in my opinion).  In late March I assisted in the Little Missy’s classroom and was able to celebrate both Easter and her 1/2 birthday with the class.

And so for this post I’d like to share all I learned about…

“How to Lose Control of a Classroom in 5 Easy Steps”

Step 1: Pique your child’s curiosity by promising that this is sure to be a “BIG day” with possible sightings of Easter Bunnies and Birthday Princesses.  Mention over and over again that you are going to “party hardy” and that she should “GET EXCITED!!!”

(Encouraging your child to count down the days leading up to school drop-off with as much zeal and gusto as she can muster can also really help with this step).

Step 2: Upon arrival, crown your child as “THE BIRTHDAY PRINCESS FOR THE DAY!” and then announce to her (already high-spirited) royal subjects that they too will get to “party hardy” today!!!

Step 3: Make sure the kids have sufficient energy for the DAY FULL OF PARTY-HARDY-NESS by feeding them the biggest, sweetest, most sprinkle- and frosting-covered “birthday donuts” you can find.

Step 4: As the sugar from the donuts hits the kids’ bloodstreams, you’ll notice that the Little Miss Birthday Girl and her pals will begin to skip and hop around the classroom in a somewhat frantic fashion.  Right in that moment, lead the kids outside holding some brightly decorated bags and tell them…

“The Easter Bunny came!  SO GET GOIN’!  GO FIND SOME EASTER EGGS!!!”

Step 5: And then as the double cocktail of donuts and Easter candy floods their systems, causing the kids to lose all ability to listen, follow instruction, or even see straight, set the pack of euphoric rugrats loose in the playground and encourage them to “play nicely.”

With your work complete, you can then sit back, relax, and let the pandemonium ensue.

(With your advil and wine at home and at the ready.)

But with an smile like this, you’ll be so glad you did.